Under the sea - diving in Mauritius

As promised, this entry is dedicated to my amazing experience diving in Mauritius.

Diving is one of those things that you either love doing, have always wanted to do but never got around to getting your flippers on and sitting the course, or have no inkling whatsoever to do even if somebody paid you! Up until two weeks ago I fell into the second category (I still have the brochures next to my bed to prove it!), so seized the chance to do my PADI Open Water diving course on my second week in Mauritius, visiting my Dad who is living and working on this island paradise.

The course took four days and I instilled (my gorgeous, very calm and patient instructor) Brian with my complete trust. A very rare thing for me to do but I was out of my depths, excuse the lame pun!

So on day one, after a quick rundown of the equipment, it was into the pool for some basic training. The best part was having to walk through the lobby of the hotel scarying the Italian tourists who the majority of, as I later found out, would rather die than go swimming in the ocean letting the 'fish touch them'. And this was coming from a good looking guy, about my age covered in tattoos. Boy, did he soundly seem so unattractive!

So out into the ocean we went. Our first dive was a wreck dive but I am buggered if I noticed or enjoyed my surroundings. I was so busy focusing on breathing and what I was doing that i may aswell still been in the pool. But I must confess, after 15 minutes I did the signal that I wanted to surface - and we did. I wasn't freaking out but was short of breath. We got the to top and I was like, right I am ready to go stright back down, much to Brian's shock!

I guess my reason was that I just needed to know I could safely surface and get out of there if I had to or even needed to. And well, I now knew I could. Go on - call me a control freak!

So after that it was amazing and by my third open water dive to 18m for over 40minutes I had completely forgotten I was underwater and was just loving swimming with all of the amazing fish. Brian realised he could now have fun with me and on one of my levitating excuses decide to position me over a live lobster on the ocean floor - unbeknownst to me - until he pointed and I looked down at this poor creature freaking out just 20cm away from my thigh. I had a great dinner that night - lobster! No, not that one but obviously a close relative.

The hardest part to getting my lisence was the theory side. I had decided to do the course in 4 days so had a lot of reading to do, before sitting the test on my last day. What I found was the more reading I did, the better I understod the situation and my equipment and the more at ease I was. I passed the test despite horrible flashbacks to high school mathematics when it was time to complete the dive table section and am now a qualified diver. Man I love being able to say that!

Diving in Mauritius is relatively affordable and my course cost around AUD$450 which is over half the cost of what it would have been at home in Australia. The only major downfall is that most instructors speak French so you must find an English speaking dive centre for when hand signals just won't do. So now I need a dive buddy to continue my underwater exploration in my own backyard now that I am (sadly) back on home soil.

Simone x

Snow one day, sunshine and surf the next

The 2007 snow season has officially come to a close, but not without drama of course. On the final days, we had 20cm of snow fall, not only keeping most resorts open for business for another two weeks but also nearly forcing me to dig my way out before driving home to Sydney after 4 amazing, fun and hard working months!

So, after two days at home, I unloaded my winter gear from Bertha the backpack and then reloaded her with my summer gear, leaving a wake of clothing mayhem behind me. It was off to Mauritius to visit my family who are living/working there at the moment and to defrost.

I had such a fabulous trip that I am going to have to break all my adventures down into a few blog entries as there is too much to write and too many gorgeous pictures to show.

But for those of you not familiar with Mauritius, it's a small Island off the coast of East Africa, not far from Madagascar. There is a large French/Mauritian population as well as Indian population now too, asthey were originally brought over to help with the sugar can crops, Mauritius' main export.

So stay tuned for my next blog on scub a diving in paradise....

Sim x

Gone fishin'

Who says fishing is just for boys? Not me - at least not after going for a fly fishing casting lesson! My boss thought it would be a good idea to write an article on girls going fishing so - guess who wound up (excuse the pun), ankle deep in womabt crap and sitting on an ants nest on the banks of the Thredbo River. Yep, moi!

But much to my shock and horror, I had a great time. Fly fishing is quite an art and actually requires some skill, unlike normal fishing which requires only patience and a good book in my opinion. Plus, there's a crafty element which is right up my alley and involves making your own flies using animal hair, feathers and whatever materials you dig up from Lincraft. Now this is my kind of sport!

My teacher, the very patient Haig, told me that girls generally make good students because we listen as opposed to boys who just want to cast the bloody thing as far as they can. And well, in no time I was on the village green casting like a pro and the old pitching arm from my softball days came in handy, once again!

Unfortunately, all I caught was a twig. And don't scoff - it was a pretty decent sized twigs as far as twigs go but I threw it back because it's all about catch and release! Wouldn't have tasted too great either!

But seriously, the fishing season doesn't officially open until this weekend so it is illegal to fish in the National Parks before then. So for the next few days I guess it will be back to the village green, practicing my technique. Hmmm... maybe today I might catch a frisbee or a small child?! x

Quarter of a Century and Not Out!

Last Saturday I turned the ripe ol' age of 25! As per usual, it just meant another excuse to go out and party - drinking far too much and dressing like I don't own a mirror!

It just so happened to be Fiona's birthday 3 days later (we are 3 years and 3 days apart) and so we had a combined retro 80s ski wear party since we are both 80s babies, at karaoke. And let's just say that when we arrived the bar it was packed but after just 2 songs, there weren't many people left! Gotta love how you sound like Whitney Houston after 2 drinks - or is that just me? We rocked the casbah, watched in awe as here came the hot stepper and remembered the summer of '69. It was all class, all the time.

We had an absolute blast - which was the main thing. With the gorgeous Helen and Lauren coming up from Sydney just for the party - thanks guys. Hels, you did that bib and brace proud and Loz, no one will ever do justice to those tight, flouro lycra tights like you did! Amen for St Vinnies!

And a special thanks to Fifi, who I know will be reading this because as she confessed, she loves reading about what she gets up to on my blog. The treasure hunt in the morning was gorgeous - thank you fo making my day and night super special.

OK, back to the embarrassing stories. So I have had many flashbacks of what happened that night, ranging from mounting the bar with the microphone to serenade the guy behind the bar (cringe) and running through Thredbo village (fully dressed) saying 'we are all going streaking, to the quad - come with!'. Oh, too funny. Lucky I am leaving this village soon!

Sim x

Shagwell by name, shag very well by reputation

So my latest batch of incriminating photos come from Monday night when it was the lifties party. It was fancy dress and my old flatmates invited Fiona and I. Scooter went as Austin Powers (he makes a great Austin!) and so I went as Felicity Shagwell just in case you can’t figure it out from the pics – ha! It was cheap and easy – OK.

So Fiona, at the 11th hour decided to go as cat woman much to Luke’s horror who had hoped she would tramp it up and be his Bond girl. But I think she looked puuurrr-fect if trampy enough in her fire engine red lipstick!
So people went to a lot of effort for the party, one guy going as Borat in the green man-kini. He pulled it off well, we thought at first. But on closer inspection at the bar he had a very pimpley bum! ‘You - not so good!’

It was a sit down dinner but well, Fi and I managed to get food poisoning. And no, it wasn’t alcohol induced! We only had a few drinks as we were still recovering from our HUGE Saturday night two days before.

And I know I seem to always say what a huge night I had, but they seem to, somehow, be getting bigger and bigger as the season comes to a close. Thank goodness there is only 2 weeks left – I don’t think I can take anymore partying.

I never thought I would say that!

Sim x

Over & Out - but not without drama!

I just completed my last TV report for the season which will air on Sports Tonight, tonight. There is now on 2 weeks left of the ski season, with everything wrapping on the October long weekend! Time has absolutely flown by!

Anyway (before I get all teary), in typical Simone style even my last TV report was full of drama! Our tripod carrier/camera assistant called in sick today so they got one of the ski instructors to fill in, since there seems to be alot of them and not many punters today. So out of the hoardes of instructors, who did they get? The Italian stallion I was 'kind of seeing' who got angry at me last weekend and we had a fight and I walked off and had a great night (i.e. read between the lines... met someone else). So anyway, I hadn't spoken to him since then and today he has to stand next to me and watch my report, throw snowballs at me for the report and be on panda eye alert (why didn't I wear waterproof mascara today?). Typical! It was awkward beyond belief!

Attached is a gorgeous pic our resort photographer got ealrier this week. It's a stunner and I had to share it with you.

So, I guess for the last time... "This is Simone Smith with the latest snow report."
xx

The past can be haunting...

It's been one of those weeks where the past has been catching up with me!
It all started when, on facebook - the website I love and hate simultaneously yet can't seem to get off - I recieved an e-mail from 'The X'. It had been a blissful two-years and well, it was a shock to say the least to see his picture and name pop up in my inbox.
And then today, I recieved a message from a friend saying: Oh man, oh man Sim. Go to www.news.com.au . Which of course I then did, only to see that picture of me with my blow up kangaroo taken by a photographer when I was in Germany at the World Cup last year flash on screen next to a story on the 'Aussie Cultural Cringe - Loud and Proud!' Wow - I am now the unofficial poster girl for cultural cringeing the world over.
That damn photo has haunted me for a year now, running four times (that I know of), in The Times, the London paper twice and once in the SMH and now this. Actually, one of them is quite a funny story.... I had just started work at the Arts Council England when I was working in London, 3 weeks after returning from Germany. My first job on day one was to go through the paper and cut out cultural clippings. So pretending I was a civilized, arts-savvy Aussie (trying to shake all convict stereotypes the poms like to mutter at us whilst looking down their nose), I opened the newspaper to see this same picture staring back at me! I screamed and of course my new employer asked if I was OK and despite my efforts to prevent her from coming over and assuring her it was nothing, she came over to see what was wrong and she couldn't help but laugh at the pic of me with the blow up roo - musttering as she looked down her nose at me! Damn it!
Then, since things always happen in threes, I went to work drinks last week and ran into a guy up at the bar who I had snogged when I was 17. It was very random to bump into him 8 years later and when i got back to the table I relayed this story back to the people at my table, not realising that he was actually part of the table - dating the girl sitting one chair up from me! It was a big table, OK!!! When will I learn to keep my mouth shut?
So, hopefully all of my skeletons are out of the closet for now - I don't think I can handle anymore surprises, just yet.
Lots of love,
Sim x

Home Sweet Home

I am sure everyone will agree with me that moving house sucks - well, I have now done it twice in one week. Well, I did it once and then poor Fiona and Marty had to pack up all my stuff and do it the second time when i was back in Sydney! If you are reading this owe you guys, BIG TIME!
Now, the first move was from Royal Bogong Number 4, out of the room I had shared with the snoronator for 3 months into a room nextdoor with Fiona. My first night I had a wonderful, sound sleep but the second night we had a visitor who entered the room when we where dead to the world and let's just say, he made himself at home! This was one of the other flatmates who was, well, completely out of it! As this was the second time this had apparently happened to poor Fi, it was now time to get out of this place.
So now I am happy to announce Fiona and I have our very own, one bedroom place which is completely free of snoring and pant dropping flatmates!
Last night we cooked dinner in our CLEAN kitchen and even made dessert - it was bliss. Unfortunately, the eggplant we were using was off so we found other things to do with it!
Sim x

ALL NIGHT LONG...

OK, so I have hit an all time low. After an awesome, relaxing weekend in Sydney seeing the family and my gorgeous friends I headed back to the hills fully recharged. So what did I do - I had an all nighter - going straight to work at 5.30am without having a single zzzzzz. OK, so i think I actually passed out for 10minutes before my alarm went off.

You see, it was the final of the Australian Freeride Series and the comp was at night, under the big lights with the hip hop act The Herd playing on the slopes straight afterwards. They were awesome and we had a great night. Then it was straight to The Keller night club for far too many drinks (yep, it was a liquid dinner). As you can see from the pics, it all got a bit loose in no time at all. As for the headband - don't even ask.

It was an incredibly fun night though - with the whole village out celebrating and with not long to go until the end of the season, everyone was out in force to end the season in style - or lack of style for some!

So the next day, as I sat in the office all alone pumping out radio and written reports I was feeling very sorry for myself. Very, very sorry for myself. I then proceeded to have 3 peices of cold pizza for breakfast, a breakfast burger at about 9am and then a kebab for lunch. Yes, my head was hung in shame all day. Oh, and did I mention potato gems at 4am!? My stomach is churning just thinking about all of this.

Needless to say, I slept soundly for 16 hours that night! And it's off to the gym tonight to try and redeem myself and get my body back on my side again.

Lots of Love,

Sim x

Total Eclipse of the Heart

I am slightly slow in getting this entry up, but last week we had a lunar eclipse. This photo doesn't really do it justice because the moon actually was a peach/pink colour for most of the eclipse and it was just beautiful but it gives you an idea nontheless.

I love looking at the moon at the best of times, but this was simply wonderful to witness. And what was even nicer, was seeing everyone brave the cold and stand outside in groups with drinks in hand, watching the eclipse. It was very cool.

So, I am terribly excited to be flying home to Sydney tonight. I haven't been home (or further away from here than Cooma) , for the last three-and-half months and am seriously craving some big city action. Of course, I am flying back for the APEC weekend chaos which is just typical and is foiling my plans of a dose of city night life on Friday night. But I am sure it will be great still and I can't wait to see my gorgeous puppy, my family and my friends (in no particular order - ha!).

But on the APEC note, check out the latest in the series of advertisements for here. It is very timely and very funny. It's good to know I am not the only one enjoying the slopes at the moment! Check it out and you will see what I mean...

http://www.thredbo.com.au/about/Bush-Pulls-Another-Snow-Job.asp

Lost of Love,
Sim x

My Best Blue Steele

So, I have only just stopped (somewhat embarrassedly) laughing after my last achievement award on the snow. So this blog is to help my bruised ego and tell you about my first official - modelling assignment.

I have attached a few pics of Fiona and our friend Gianluca (a ski instructor from Italy) doing our very best to drink cocktails and eat meals as naturally as possible without wondering where on earth these pics may turn up and haunt me down the track, and do I have a double chin from that angle. And might I add, the food was stone cold and the drinks, non-alcoholic. What tight-ass'!

So I guess if all else fails in my ski racing career, I can become a Big W catalogue model, well maybe! Gosh, the things Fiona and I will do for a free meal.

Look out for us in a ski resort catalogue direct to you next season.

Sim x

I WON... well kind of!

Oh, I am still laughing and it's three days later but I actually won at the staff ski race I wrote about in my last blog. Well, when I say won I don't mean the event, nor my age group (as originally thought!), no, no I won the... wait for it... encouragement award!

In other words, nice try but man you sucked! I checked my time and I turned out to be in the middle of the field but I think the fact that on the day I stood at the top of the course freaking out, asking everyone around me what I am meant to do and how am i meant to do it may have assisted in the award - I was clearly a first timer! Although, I reckon the red headband saying 'feelin it' and the hot pink one piece ski suit didn't hurt either.

But wait, it gets better. Do you know what I actually won? A day's ski hire so I can actually learn to ski properly. Oh, I have never laughed so hard in my laugh. This is one award going striaght to the pool room.

I always thought I was special, but not in the 'special friend' way! Oh well, there's always next year.

Love,

'Slow and Steady Smith' xx

I've got a carrot in my facsinator... darlingk!

So today was the annual staff memorial day ski race. Now I will admit it, I am not a fabulous skier and even after 3 months down here I am no where near hot dogging it down the slopes just yet. But my boss convinced me to go in today's race which is more of a laugh then anything, but still involves going down a ski course (the Rosi Racecourse) one at time, through 12 gates with everyone watching. How it works is that you do the course twice and you have to try and do it in the same time. You are in a team of 2, and so the difference in your two runs are added together to get your final score. This is my kind of race - they don't call me slow and steady smith for nothing!

I went with Haig, our wonderful sticks/tripod carrier who is a fanatstic skier. And when I say went, I mean I entered him and I last night at 4.55pm (the shut off for entry forms was 5pm) and told him this morning. His reaction was - we don't have to actually ski together do we?! After from being completely offended, i laughed and then told him he had to wear a dress too in the 'racing theme'. Me on the otherhand, resurrected the old hot pink one piece and added a fascinator to the outfit. The funniest part was that I made it down the run safely and poor old Haig stacked it - so I don't think I will be drinking from the cup tonight!

So the results still aren't in just yet, but I am not holding my breath. But as you can see from the pics it was a really fun day with everyone dressing up and the Ouzo was flowing straight from the bottle to the lips at the starting line!

Sim x

Cabin Fever – CURED!

So after moaning about suffering from a severe case of cabin fever after being in the village, living on top of people 24/7 for 3 months, I finally escaped and feel 1,000% better. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t love this place because I absolutely do but when you know every person you pass on the street, including their family lineage, then it becomes a bit much. Beside, my house has turned into a junkyard thanks to the two lifties and ski patroller I live with. I now refer to it as the 'bog of eternal stench'. But I can’t get into just how bad it is just now as I might cry and spiral back into my bout of cabin fever.

So when I escaped, I jumped in the car and drove to Canberra. Who thought Canberra would be an oasis of entertainment and a shopping mecca. How my perspectives have changed! I briefly saw my Mum who was taking her class to Questacon and then I shopped until I literally dropped, mostly due to being weighted down by bags and credit card receipts! What can I say, I had three months shopping down time to catch up on.

Then it was back to my gorgeous hotel room (courtesy of my boss who had been witnessing my downwards spiral due to lack of sleep and household hygiene) and after swan diving onto my big queen bed like a true princess, I ordered room service and watched TV (something I hadn’t done in ages) and ate my citrus cheese cake whilst painting my toe nails. It will go down in history as the best, most self-indulgent day I have had all year.

The next day, after doing the walk of shame by myself to the breakfast buffet – ALONE – I met up with my gorgeous Aunt who drove down to see me and had lunch and another round of shopping.

So am back now, staring out at the slopes, feel like my old self again. And the best news… I am moving into the flat next-door with the stunning Fifi my partner in crime in absolutely everything in a few nights. Amen, the accommodation god hasn’t forgotten me after all!

Sim x

Reliving the World Cup – Germany 2006

True to her word, the darling Michelle posted the pics of our beloved blow up Roo who fearlessly followed us around Munich for our World Cup antics (R.I.P.), on facebook following the recent spotting of my roo’s relative on the slopes here in Thredbo the other day. So, I thought I should share these with you because he was one of the best travel companions I have had, he didn’t whinge once and was always pumped for a good time (OK, lame joke alert!).

This Roo knew how to have a good time, and sure he may have drunk too much at the Australia vs. Brazil game but he bounced back (lame joke two, one more and I will quit writing altogether, I promise). And then he was there with a broom, ready to right his wrongs. But unfortunately, all good things must come to an end and he became more than a little deflated when Australia didn’t make it past those nasty, cheating Italians (OK – I am out).

So rest in peace Roo – Shell, Ray and I will never forget you.
Sim xxx

Famous Faces from the Slopes

Just a quick one today, but I have had numerous celebrity sightings on the slopes lately which I thought I should share with you. The first is the gorgeous, Sally Stanton from Saturday Disney who I have had the pleasure to work with in the past. Sally is former snow reporter herself and was so lovely in sharing all her best kept secrets about what to expect down here before I, rather hesitantly, packed my bags and headed for the hills in May this year (wow – has it really been that long?!).

Now, yesterday I walked past Andrew O’Keefe of Deal or No Deal fame in the village but my highlight would have to be when Charlie from Hi-5 skied up to me when I was doing a report up at Karel’s to say she always watches my reports before skiing straight off again! By the time I realised who it was she was gone, but I was chuffed nonetheless.

Now I also have to mention spotting Cate Blanchett at Thredboland last week, dropping her kids off before hitting the slopes herself. I just adore Cate and can’t believe how stunning she looked, even with a beanie on and sans make-up. It’s just not fair! Unfortunately, my inner groupie was suppressed long enough to prevent me from running up, gushing about how much I admire her and asking for a photo and makign a right idiot of myself.

So that’s all my celebrity spotting for now. Stay tuned for more stars of the slopes.

Sim x

Rip Curl Pro Freeride Comp

I have just a had a few big days at work covering the Rip Curl Pro Freeride Comp here in Thredbo. Despite the crap weather, and I mean crap (which is bad coming from the keyboard fo a snow reporter), the event was a 'great success' and with $25,000 worth of cash and prizes there was huge international and local interest with the likes of Andy Finch, Chris Booth, Andrea Berchtold and Russ Holt competing - not that I knew who they were.

But all SERIOUSNESS aside, I was left to report on an event I knew very little about so I did some 'research' and 2 minutes before the comp plonked down in the snow next to a bunch of boarders to pick their brains about what the hell a sitchback 9 was? After a crash course in freeride and slopestyle moves I was starting to question my sources... 'was there really a move called the truck driver? And was I prepared to say that on national and cable TV and try and sound convincing?'.

My answer came (as a big fat no), when I was told one of the riders just pulled off a 'PHat Kanga-Wallaby something, something'. Yep, this was never going to work - these guys were clearly having a lend! So I decided to join in and inspired by Roy and HG's 'battered sav' commentary of the Olympic gymnastics I decided to make up my own, so next season look out for the 'Greasy DimSim Reverse 9'!

So two days later and many reports later I am much more informed in the art of slopestyle and freeride and can pick a fake trick name from a mile away. Yep, who said blondes weren't SMRT?!

So there were some pretty cool tricks to come out of the event and a whole heap of drinking to happen afetrwards. I am still recovering - seriously. My other lesson learnt was that if anyone offers you a shot of Glecier Ice, walk... nay run... far, far away preferably in a 'Backside Pluto-pup Tuck' position.

Lots of Love,

Simone x

Sunrise in the Snowies

I have finally come to terms with the early morning starts here at work as a snow reporter. After two months you’d certainly hope so, but I never professed to be an early morning person. OK, maybe that’s a slight fib and in fact in my job interview when asked whether I was an early morning person I smiled sweetly and said, ‘of course!’. Well, the job interview was at 7.30am in the city so surely that proved I was a morning person because not only was I on time, could string a sentence together and was looking presentable, except for that pillow-case crease mark running down my left cheek, but I was obviosuly convincing enough to get the job! So what more screams ‘morning person’ than all those things, oh and maybe a gym bag to prove I’d already squished in a gym session’ at some crazy hour. But the truth of the matter was that not only did my alarm not go off that morning (clearly not a user error!), leaving me running ridiculously late but then I had to get a lift to the train station from my mother (god love her, who drove me in her pyjamas like only a mother would), so I didn’t miss the train altogether!

So you get the idea of how much of a morning person I am NOT, right? Right. So starting work at 5.30am four times a week has been challenging to say the least, especially when you are on local radio and national TV starting from 6am. Well, this is why this picture is so special as I snapped it at work of the sun rising over the snowie mountains just as a crow flew past (also photographic evidence of my being a morning person now). It’s so wonderful to be up at this crazy hour of the day and get to witness the start of a new day – wow was I missing out before. I never thought I’d say that.

Anyway, I miss you all heaps and am coming back for a few days to Sydney soon so hope to catch up then.

Sim x

Why Mountain Men and Me Don't Mix

So I have avoided talking about my personal life on this blog for a long time. And when I say 'personal life' I really mean love life. But after a few big nights out and my very dear friend and regular confidante, Rachel, begging me to write something about it on my blog, here goes...

I have discovered that mountain men and I don't mix. Mainly because there are far too many of them to choose from and I have a hard time making decisions at the best of time. So my latest story happened to a very good 'friend of mine' who happened to have a party pash with a hot italian stallion ski instructor, only to do the same thing a few nights later (no, she really isn't a tart!) only to find out that not only do the two guys know each other but they live together. But wait, it gets better... they share a room together! So despite the abumdance of mountain men, I... I mean my friend, kisses two guys who live in the one room.

And if that's not bad enough, she then has to throw a coat over her head and run out of a night club when she spots one of them a few nights later due to 1. pure embarassment and 2. because she was with another guy! What a shocker. So that's why mountain men and I don't mix.

The attached picture is from my night out last night to a party at the Eagles Nest restuarant at the top of the mountain. It was a great night but my head still hurts today as I sit here at work. And it's really not surprising just check out the calibre of photos to come from last night. And for the record, that's not me in the pic. It's 'my friend'.

Lots of Love, Sim x

What does your beanie say about you?

One thing I have discovered as I sit here and day dream out the office window at the skiers and boarders on Friday Flat is that you can read lot into what people wear, especially on their heads. After hours of contemplation, this is what I have come up with. I warn you now, this is deep beyond belief and may make you think twice before you reach for a beanie…

HEADBAND – GIRLS
I have nice hair, I want you to see my nice hair because it took me two hours to straighten my nice hair to make it look nice. If it rains and my hair goes frizzy I will just die!

HEADBAND – BOYS
One of two scenarios: I have big ears and nice hair, or I think that I am cool enough to pull-off girls’ headwear without looking like a chump.

BEANIE WITH POM POMS
I had such a good childhood that I want to dress like I did when I was 5 years old. Anyone for a cordial?

BEANIE WITH EAR-FLAPS
If I wasn’t wearing a beanie I would probably be wearing a trucker cap or an akubra – now watch me crush an empty beer can on my forehead.

BEANIES WITH A VISOR
I am hoping everyone will follow suit, making this the fashion item of the season - if only I could see where I was going.

FUR HAT
I didn’t have enough money for a trip to St Anton’s in Austria and in my tantrum-like state when my sugar daddy said we were only going to the Australian ski fields I forgot to pack my Prada beanie so this dead possum on the side of the road was all I could find to keep my head warm.

HOODIE
You can find me at the terrain park 24/7 and chances are my pants will be sitting awkwardly around my waist showing just a hint of boxer and an inch of butt crack to entice the ‘ledies’.

POINTED BEANIE
No, I don’t think I am Noddy, I just couldn’t find a mirror to check my beanie fit when I bought it, or it was a gift from my girlfriend who is skiing with me now.

NO BEANIE
I have never been skiing or boarding before. You will find me at Friday Flat, on my butt and freezing cold.

HELMET
My mother/father/girlfriend/wife said I couldn’t go riding without it.

FUNNY HAT
If I am over the age of 10, I must be working with kids, on a bux weekend to the slopes or the world’s biggest attention seeker.

And for the record, I am a proud owner of just about every single type of beanie described above – except for the Fur Hat as that’s just ridiculous. So what does that say about me? If I was being objective, I’d say that maybe it means that I am indecisive and haven’t found my niche on the slopes but truthfully it means I am ‘huge girl’ who likes to shop and colour co-ordinate at all times.

Sim x

Crazy Weather on the Slopes

The weather over the last few days on the slopes has been crazy, almost as crazy as my love life but that’s a whole other story that I am not going to share with you right now.

The last three days, gale force winds have swept through the mountains, pretty much sweeping away everything else with it. I thought our roof was going to blow off the other night with winds measuring 140km and with most chairlifts being put on windhold.

However, there was one day between all of this crazy weather where the sun came out in full force and shone down on us – as in the picture. Only problem is that it was so hard packed that I picked up a nice momento from the slopes at the bottom of my stock!

And on other pressing news, I have finally bit the bullet and joined facebook much to my own disgust. I have held out this long but could no longer stand my friends constantly send those e-mail reminders to join. So see you on Facebook, unless of course you have more will power and haven’t succumb yet!

Simone x

Snow shoeing – one snowy step at a time

My folks recently came down to visit me in Thredbo. I think it was also just a really good excuse for a weekend away but that’s fine with me – it was great to see them and to dine out for a change. My meagre budget usually limits me to one night at the pizzeria or kebab shop per week! Nay, make that per fortnight!

So Mum and Dad had never skied in their life which left me wondering what we were going to do for three days in al Alpine resort. You have to hit the slopes in some capacity if you come all the way to the snow. So I strapped my thinking cap on and enrolled us into snow shoeing.

It was such a magic, blue sky day and we had a blast. Sadly Mum got sick and had to pull out but Dad and I unleashed our inner Antarctic explorer and strapped on our snow shoes which I was relieved to find our much more fancy than the tennis racquet-looking contraptions from once upon a time. We had a blast and I cannot stop recommending it to everyone down here.

I think the best part was going backcountry and being away from the hoards of skiers and boarders. There was not a soul around and we could see all the way to Mount Kosciusko. It was easy to become snap happy – it was so picturesque.

The brochure claimed that if you can walk, you can snow shoe. There’s really not much more to it than that!

Simone x

Record Breaking Flare Run

Last Monday, we broke an Australian record. It was the 10th anniversary of the Thredbo road collapse and to pay tribute to the 18 people who passed away on July 30 1997 we held a flare run in Thredbo.

The previous Australian record was 745 skiers here in Thredbo on the 1st anniversary, but this year we were hoping to break this. The World Record is held in Switzerland with 1,321 riders doing a flare run on 1st January 2000 to kick-off the millennium.

So how many skiers and boarders registered for Thredbo’s 10th Anniversary flare run? 1,400! Sadly on 1,269 of these riders turned up on the night despite it being a gorgeous, clear full moon night. So although we just missed out on the World Record, we smashed the Australian record! Never in our wildest dreams did we imagine we would get that many riders.

I was working on the night, giving ‘on the spot’ radio reports from the chairlift so was unable to go in the flare run but I did get a great view of it from the pub (with a drink in hand of course) and it was unreal – just check out the picture our resort photographer took – an unreal spectacle and a fitting tribute to those that passed away but loved the mountain and Thredbo.

Congrats to all involved.

Simone x

Re-united with my blow-up roo

Before I get into my most recent, whacky sighting on the slopes you have to hear the back story first.

I went to Germany last June/July with the lovely Shell and Ray for the World Cup which I must add was one of the best and biggest experiences of my life. But there was also a fourth companion on our trip, my blow-up kangaroo. I bought him for a small fortune in Clapham Fancy Dress in London and he came to all games with us, sat in our room and literally had as much fun as we did. I wish I had the many photos of him eating a Big Mac on a midnight Maccas run, rolling down the main strasse of Munich in a shopping trolley and sitting on the tram going to the Croatia vs. Australia Game with some Croatian fans. This roo got around and I got rather attached to him. Might I add that a picture of roo and I made it in the London Times newspaper and the Sydney Morning Herald all the way back home. We were quite the pair!

Now at the Croatia vs. Australia game I had my roo with me and in all of the excitement of making it through to the next round roo, and yes I am ashamed of this part, was thrown in the air and got swallowed up by the revelling crowd. I couldn’t find him anywhere. It dampened the celebrations for a few seconds but I knew I would fin him – he wouldn’t abandon me now, not after all we had been through.

And yes, I did find him but it wasn’t a happy ending. Roo was deflated (literally) and crushed under a seat. I spotted him when I was leaving and had to look away, he was a World Cup casualty, he was road kill on the side of the celebratory highway.

So, imagine my surprise when I was standing on the slopes in Australia, doing a piece to camera for my TV snow report and something caught out of the corner of my eye. “Could that be my roo skiing towards me?!” The answer was yes. I have the picture to prove it. It was a grand re-union and just goes to prove that ‘happily ever after’ stories do happen every day.

THE END.

Simone x

Hideously Hot

Saturday night was the Viva Glam Party at the Lake Jindabyne Hotel. It was meant to be a fundraiser and although I am sure they raised a substantial amount of money for the up and coming winter athletes, the focus of the night was solely on what everyone was wearing.

As you can see from the pic, my wingman Miss Fifi aimed to look hideously hot – and that we did. Think the love child of Cindy Lauper in all her 80s flouro glory and the soccer mum from hell with a fetish for parachute material tracksuits and you have our outfits down to a tee. The theme was glamorous outrageous but I think we got too caught up in the outrageous factor. I have never worn a one piece ski suit before and I hope I never have to – those things are a nightmare to get off to go to the toilet! Thank goodness I had to work the next morning at 8am and couldn’t drink (yes, sadly I don’t have to be blind drunk to dress and dance like an idiot!).

My little secret was I wore my one piece inside out – it was hot pink inside and looked so much

better then the gross green and purple design on the inside. I thought I was so clever until someone pointed out I forgot to cut the tag off the back – ha ha! I got dared to reverse it halfway through the night and reveal my secret identity but I got too carried away and forgot. Plus, it would have taken about 20 minutes to squeeze in and out of again! However, I did find a receipt in the pocket. I checked the date and this hot little number was last worn at perisher Blue in 1996 – 1996! Someone actually wore this 11 years ago!

It was such a fun night. So many people went to a huge effort. Standouts were Super Mario, and the Evil Cannevil twins. The DJ played some quality 80s disco all night and I think I burnt a hole in the bottom of my green Converse chuck tailors from all the running man moves I did.

So the million dollar question, did anyone touch the one piece? No, no they didn’t’. But in the ‘touch the one piece game’ I wrote about last time, I must have received a big bonus of 10 points for wearing one! That should bring my tally to about 12.

Have a good one and do what I say, not what I do!

Simone

Bottoms Up

Being Sunday morning I thought I would take this chance to discuss one of the many great traditions in the mountains… shotting a few schnapps after a big day on the slopes to warm the soul and loosen up the dancing feet. I am well versed in this practice now after 2 months in the snowies!

The après ski venue is your call and the type of schnapps is completely up to your taste buds but the way you knock it back is non-optional. There’s only one way to shot it in the mountains - the little finger must hold the base of the shot glass and the thumb must rest on the rim.

I have done my research and legend has it that once upon a time, schnapps was drunk out of a ceramic shot-glass and passed around. By holding the shot glass in this way your lips don’t actually touch the glass therefore making it a much more hygienic communal drinking exercise. Ahmen for that.

So what makes schnapps the drink of choice on the slopes? You can’t grow grapes on the mountains due to the cold climate and altitude but you can grow fruit for schnapps. Simple as that.
Now there’s also one more rule before knocking back a shot, you must lock eyes with the people you cheers with otherwise, rumour has it, you’ll have bad luck. I was told it was because you will have bad sex for the rest of your life but this has since been ridiculed when I (rather sheepishly) asked around. So drinking schnapps might seem like a lot to remember but you can’t fight tradition… bottoms up!

Sim x

The Blizzard Wizard – too funny!

OK, so it is really touch work being a snow reporter. Apart from starting work at 5.30am and being on radio at 6am and on national TV live at 6.45am some days, you are also responsible for relying important information to would be skiers and boarders. So it is a hugely fun job as well and I wouldn’t swap places with anyone, we do cop some flack from the public and other resort colleagues who claim that we ‘lie, stretch the truth and must be blind!’.

Part of the job description included, must be able to ski, have media experience and be extremely thick-skinned! We can be standing outside in the freezing snow and have people hurl abuse at us as they ski by – really nice. But the best line I heard and one I actually use myself now is, this…

“Why does a snow reporter make a good girlfriend? She thinks 5cm is 15cm!” Insert canned laughter here. So basically, any joke about weather reporters you've got... chances are I have heard it all before.

The other day, however, there was a blizzard and I came up with what I thought was a terribly creative line which I later used on national TV. Ready for it? “The blizzard wizard has cast a snowy spell over the mountain today.” It really reeks of cheese, I know that but it sounded like pure gold. However, my ever cheerful and funny colleagues haven’t let me live this one down and in fact, my nickname is now the blizwiz which has lead to the attached picture being mocked up with one of the guys who had far too much time on his hands! I think it’s hilarious, even if it looks like I have just kissed a toad. So the moral of today’s story – always look for the humour in every comment and situation and then vent and whinge later on. Thanks for reading as I blow up off steam for today!

Ciao x